Article contributed by Edward Wang
The thing that I find the most disgusting is soggy wet hair that is on the
floor. I hate it because of the experiences that I
have had. So, back when I was 8, I used to go to a swimming
pool to swim. But the problem was that when I had to change, the
stalls all had clumps of wet, soggy, and gross hair.The stalls were
very small so there was barely any space to move in so I sometimes
had to stand in a corner and try to change. Whenever I see clumps of
hair, I picture them in my mouth for some reason and I get a really bad
feeling that it's true, but when I check it
isn't!!! And whenever I have to shower I have to dodge the hair. In
order to do that, I have to make a big hassle and sometimes I
even trip on the hair. Also, I have big trouble at home too! When I
shower at home, there is always hair in the drains and I have to lift
them out of the drains. When I have to cut my hair I always have to
be super careful not to step on any. Sometimes on the streets in
China when it's raining for some reason there is a lot of hair in the
puddles and floor. Now you know why I hate hair on the ground.
Great writing! Good use of sensory details let readers into the story and express your strong feelings well.
ReplyDeleteNice job using five senses. I can understand what you mean and I like the way you describe what you think is the most disgusting thing.
ReplyDeletehi
ReplyDeletehi
DeleteI like that you have many descriptive details. I also liked that you used the five senses.
ReplyDeleteThis is a really good article and I can't find anything bad about it.
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